There is a misconception in our communities regarding how unity manifests itself among Armenians. Many avoid the term for fear that it means a lack of diversity or the prevalence of a singular thought. Others believe that in order for unity to emerge there must be winners and losers. Our inability to compromise with each other gives credence to this school of thought.
Dr. Vartan Gregorian and Edward Avedisian (Photo courtesy of NAASR)
Almost five years ago, the National Association for Armenian Studies and Research (NAASR) opened its new Armenian studies facility in Belmont, Massachusetts. The humble and primary benefactors of the building, the late Edward Avedisian and his wife Pam, insisted that the building not bear their name but rather that of a person of prominence in the field of philanthropy and education. They approached the late Dr. Vartan Gregorian, who graciously accepted the honor. Dr. Gregorian was widely respected for his accomplishments in university education and philanthropic institutions. During the gala banquet that opened the new center, he shared his perspective on his beloved Armenian communities. As a visionary and forward thinker, Dr. Gregorian stated that he believed our best days were ahead of us, because “there is more that unites us than divides us.” It is always a pleasure to be in the midst of such wisdom, but these words resonated deep in my soul.
In one simple phrase, he managed to capture the essence of what hinders us while also paving a path for our success. Dr. Gregorian was not referring to the reunification of the Armenian church or any particular political policy. His comments were directed to the very broad base of the pyramid of our people and the values that will continue to bond our civilization. Why do the fourth or fifth generations born in the diaspora continue to practice their heritage? Why do Armenians in the diaspora seek each other out and continue to evolve with new communities as demographics shift? What drives the emotional identity that sustains who we are? The answers lie in “what unites us.” Our divisions are generally layered above the foundation of our unified values. Differences of opinion on current events are much less important than mutual respect in the long term. We sometimes forget this, but Dr. Gregorian reminded us of this basic truth.
Most activists are problem solvers. They attempt to prevent problems or focus on what is broken and needs to be fixed. Living in the problem solving and prevention world can be exhausting and debilitating. Progress is slow, and often there is a blurred line between problem solving and the perception of negativity. The majority of our tribe would prefer that we simply carry on and not create any controversy. Armenians in the diaspora are socially focused. Interpersonal relationships and community standing are important to most participants. The problem solving world can be risky and threaten social positions. Often problem solvers stand alone when arriving at a crossroads. These are special people, because they are the conscience of the community, but it can be a dark world to always focus on what’s wrong. I find it beneficial and essential for continuity to come up for the fresh air of what unites us. It cleanses our thinking to remember that problem solving can breed disagreements, but our reason to be lies in what unites us.
In this sea of storms, the good news is that many of us may disagree but share a common love. Whether citizens in Armenia, government officials, diaspora benefactors or participants in diaspora community life, what unites us is love for the homeland and a passion for its prosperity.
These are words worth remembering, not simply during good times, but when we are in the heat of the conflict. It would be wise to remember that although we may disagree on the matter at hand, it is quite possible that our hearts are in the same place. Before we let our emotions turn into fuel for damage, we should be cautious about judging others. We may disagree on policy, but forward thinking people will not challenge an individual’s intent or character.
One of the reasons that I admired Dr. Gregorian and carry his quote from that banquet close to my heart is that he was an eternal optimist. Some mistakenly identify optimism as a form of naivety. It has little to do with the stereotypes of “rose-colored glasses” or “not living in reality.” True optimists are forward thinkers who do not burden themselves with past mistakes, pre-judgements and a victim mentality. It is no coincidence that future-oriented strategists such as Gregorian, Nubar Afeyan and Ruben Vardanyan created the Aurora Initiative and several follow-up programs designed to pull us out of our victim mentality, join the world community and focus us on a prosperous Armenia. Optimists believe in our fundamental capabilities, and that belief drives their thinking. It is similar to having faith. Christians do not look for or expect “proof.” Faith is a relationship that resides in our heart. It is not distracted by worldly events. Optimists understand that what unites us will always be greater than what divides us. Otherwise, what is the point of our existence?
Earlier, I mentioned the misconceptions concerning unity. In my view, the greatest attributes of unity are respect, civility and love. It is less about a lack of diversity and more about setting boundaries of disagreeing that do not cross the lines of respect. For example, while I understand that we are all entitled to our opinions, I do not agree that the diaspora has the right to call for regime change in Armenia. This has little to do with the issues being debated but more about the rights of citizens and limits of the diaspora.
Most of the conflict today is in the political arena. Politics has always been a breeding ground for disagreements. Whether in our living rooms, coffee shops or the halls of legislatures, politics can be a rough neighborhood. Many Americans lament the lack of civility and respect that has been the recent hallmark of the U.S. Congress. Retirements are increasing as some in service become disillusioned with the inability to find common ground and produce solutions to critical issues. Finding what unites us and putting it into practice will initiate the recovery of our Congress. Compromise and civility are best practiced when the distance between partisans is smaller. As extremes assert their control, it becomes more difficult to find common ground. I would hope that reasonable people will eventually emerge who demonstrate Dr. Gregorian’s advice.
I have found that things are never as good as some advocate nor as bad as the gloom others pronounce. These “filtered” comments have a great deal to do with one’s position in political circles. I remember, years ago, meeting a member of the opposition during the administration of former Armenian President Serge Sargysyan. There was a reception here in the United States. I made the mistake of introducing her as a member of the government, and she quickly corrected me that she was not part of the government. She was merely stating that a member of the opposition in parliament is not part of the government, which is defined as the ruling party. I told her that in this country, if you are a member of Congress, you are considered part of the legislative branch of government. I urged her to find common ground. It was during that time that opposition parties in the U.S. Congress became more obstructionist in trying to neutralize the ruling party. It matters little today which party is in control. The minority party spends more time preventing than collaborating. What unites Americans today? Focusing on what divides us has led to dysfunction in the U.S. Congress.
Is our glass half empty or half full? If we choose to exacerbate our divisions, then the glass is half empty and losing liquid. I believe our people can build trust and prosperity by empowering what unites us. I worked for a company years ago that was suffering from internal conflict. We invested considerable time with some talented consultants to focus on what we had in common and what had been a unifying mission. Not only did this lead to improvement in functional performance, but we discovered that what divided us was less significant when put in the context of the unifying mission.
The diaspora has incredible value to add to the prosperity of the homeland. The true value of that capability can best be nurtured in an environment focused on what unites us as a people, a culture and a civilization. The diaspora can and must do better. Urging western politicians to support “a right to return to Artsakh with security guarantees” lacks any substance. These same foreign governments did absolutely nothing while our brethren were being starved during the blockade. Who would provide security guarantees for an area that has been depopulated? What Armenian would live under those conditions? This is not focusing on what unites us. Listening to American politicians expound rhetoric on Artsakh adds to the humiliation. It is difficult. We are mourning the losses as our grandparents did over 100 years ago, but we must be strong. During these times of challenge, I offer the words of the late Dr. Gregorian to inspire us.
Author information
Stepan Piligian
Stepan was raised in the Armenian community of Indian Orchard, MA at the St. Gregory Parish. A former member of the AYF Central Executive and the Eastern Prelacy Executive Council, he also served many years as a delegate to the Eastern Diocesan Assembly. Currently , he serves as a member of the board and executive committee of the National Association for Armenian Studies and Research (NAASR). He also serves on the board of the Armenian Heritage Foundation. Stepan is a retired executive in the computer storage industry and resides in the Boston area with his wife Susan. He has spent many years as a volunteer teacher of Armenian history and contemporary issues to the young generation and adults at schools, camps and churches. His interests include the Armenian diaspora, Armenia, sports and reading.
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